well you can't waste a boner
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
