So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
