How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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