I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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