I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.