Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind