Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I cut my penus on the lid.
she told me i tasted like america
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
