i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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