i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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