there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
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If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
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We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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