Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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