So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
