I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
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