listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
