I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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