Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Randomize
