I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I am mentally ready for anal.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
