She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
