I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
where does the pee come out of this thing
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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