He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
