just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
