We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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