This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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