Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
