btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?