your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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