...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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