I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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