I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
