There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize