Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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