I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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