chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Randomize
