So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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