why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
