ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
and you fell through a lawn chair
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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