i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize