Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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