I think I died a long time ago.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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