Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
