Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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