Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
All I want is dick and wine.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize