Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize