did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
