Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
