so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize