woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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