We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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