I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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