i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize