And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
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Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
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I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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