she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize