I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I will be naked everywhere
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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