Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
